Just over a week ago I filled my notepad. It seems stupid to be emotional over a some paper, but that's 591 days of work.
In that notepad there are 30 published pieces, 1 published book, 1 book draft, 5 issue plans for Kiloran and numerous other plans. It's seen me through everything; 3 break-ups, exam stress, moving city and many many more ups and downs. These pages have seen some FEELS. It's strange to say goodbye.
When I started writing in this notepad I didn't take myself seriously at all. I used to just write like a diary with my thoughts normally forming into poems or prose. Journals and diaries never really stuck with me, but for some reason this did. And I never really thought about it, I never read much poetry before I seemed to accidentally start writing it. And that's one of the biggest misconceptions I've found in poetry, that it must be traditional and formal and structured. But like all art, your poetry can be anything you want. It's doesn't need to be stanzas and short lines and rhyme, if you think your scribblings are poetry, they're poetry.
I talk about my writing a lot on here and over of my instagram, but it's normally promo rather than my absolute and total love of it. I tell people about it all the time, and it's always my first suggestion when anyone is struggling, but writing is an incredible and proven form of therapy. Writing and creative expression is often used in mental health treatment as it's obviously just such a freeing, cathartic activity. It's an amazing way to process your own emotions and work out how you're feeling in a way that is private and non-confrontational. I can't recommend it enough. Get to know yourself, get to know your emotions, get to know your creative brain.
Closing this notepad feels good. Obviously I'm proud of the work in there, I can see myself growing as a writer and becoming more refined. But mostly I'm really proud of what it all stands for, seeing hard situations turned into something that I can use and is beneficial. Pain into product. That's what I'm proud of, and that's why I love writing and why this notepad means so much. Closing it feels like closing it on all that past pain, walking away with something good.
Find your expression, whether it be writing, or art, or journaling, or music, or anything. Having an outlet for your emotions that is personal and healthy is so important, and having something that is totally yours unless you choose to share will introduce you to a whole layer of feels that you might not have explored before. Trust me, you'll feel lighter.
I'm excited to see what comes from my new notepad, and I can't wait to share some of the work created in the old one.